S03E19 - The Limo
No: 36 | Season: 3 Episode: 19 | Air Date: 26-Feb-1992 | Production #318
On a whim, Jerry and George take a limo from a passenger that Jerry knows never made it on the plane. While taking the limo they call Elaine & Kramer to join them for an event at Madison Square Garden, but it isn't the type of event they were hoping for.
Director and Writers
Director: Tom Cherones
Writers: Larry Charles
Jerry: Excuse me, driver, why are we getting off this exit?
Chauffeur: To pick up the other members of your party.
George: Right. The other members of our party. (closes partition) The other members of our party? What other members of our party? I didn't even know we were in a party. Oh, I'm telling you, the jig is up.
Jerry: It was a bad jig to begin with. We never should've started this jig.
George: It was a good jig.
Jerry: It was a bad jig, a terrible, terrible jig. What are we gonna do now? They're gonna know you're not O'Brien.
George: There could be more than one O'Brien on a plane who ordered a limo.
Jerry: First of all, you don't look like any O'Brien, period.
George: Well, you should've been O'Brien!
Jerry: I don't even wanna be Murphy anymore! Do I still have to be Murphy?
George: Yes, you have to be Murphy!
Jerry: It makes no sense now, me being Murphy!
George: You're Murphy!
Jerry: I'm Seinfeld!
George: YOU'RE MURPHY!
(George is giddy with excitement as he and Jerry are sitting in the back of O'Brien's limo)
George: This is incredible! This is one of the greatest things I've ever done in my life! I'm gonna call my mother.
Jerry: What for?
George: I dunno, I'm in a limo.
Kramer: (points to Jerry) O'Brien, long time no see. (points to George) How's tricks, Murphy?
Tim: Why did you call him O'Brien and him Murphy?
Jerry: No, he was talking to me. He's cross-eyed.
Elaine: It could be very confusing.
George: Hello, Ma? It's me. Guess where I am? In the back of a limo. No, nobody died. It's a long story, I can't tell you now. Because I can't. I said I can't. If I could, I would. Would you stop it. All right, look, I'm getting off. No, I'm not telling you. How's this - I'm never telling you. I don't care. No. Fine. Never!
Jerry: Who's gonna be O'Brien?
George: I'll be O'Brien.
Jerry: Who am I?
George: You're you.
Jerry: Just me?
George: You don't wanna be you?
Jerry: Well, if you're gonna be O'Brien, why can't I be somebody?
George: Like who?
Jerry: Dylan Murphy.
Jerry: What, now you wanna be Dylan Murphy?
George: Well, I like Dylan.
Jerry: You could be Colin.
George: Okay, Colin O'Brien.
Jerry: I'm Dylan Murphy.
George: I'm Colin O'Brien.
George: (reading the speech he's been given) ". . . and so the Jews, through their Zionist occupied governments, use the black man to import drugs into our underprivileged, white, minority communities."
Jerry: You're not going to open with that, are you?
George: (on the phone) Yeah, hello, police? Uh, yeah, listen, uh, we're in the back of a limo in Queens-
(Tim re-enters the limo)
George Uh...Astroturf? You know who's responsible for that, don't you?! The Jews!(hangs up the phone) Ah, the Jews hate grass. They always have, they always will.
Tim: We'll be ready in a minute.
George: Would you excuse us for a minute, Tim boy, we're, uh, kind of in the middle of something.
Tim: With all due respect, Mr. O'Brien, we're just about to leave.
(George moves and sits down next to Tim)
George: Tim, who's the head of the Aryan Union, you or me?
Tim: You are.
George: And who is responsible for making hatemongering and fascism popular again?
Tim: You are.
George: Okay? I think you forgot something.
Tim: I'm sorry.
George: Good. Now, get out.
Jerry: I'll tell you one thing, this chauffeur's gonna be waiting a while. O'Brien's not showing up.
George: How do you know?
Jerry: He was in Chicago. Flight was overbooked; they wouldn't let him on the plane. He kept screaming how he had to get to Madison Square Garden.
George: We should take his limo.
Jerry: Yeah, right.
(Jerry begins to walk away, but George suddenly stops him)
George: Wait a second. Think about it. He's not showing up. Wait till you see the line for cabs, it's, like, 45 minutes long. You said he's in Chicago.
Jerry: He's definitely in Chicago.
George: Well, the guy's just standing there.
(Jerry looks at the chauffeur, who checks his watch)
Jerry: How would we do it?
George: We just go up to him and say, "We're O'Brien."
Jerry: Maybe he knows O'Brien.
George: No, he doesn't know O'Brien, if he knew O'Brien, he wouldn't have a sign.
(George is in front of the news camera as the on-screen graphic says "DONALD O'BRIEN Leader of the Aryan Union").
George: I am not O'Brien! I am not O'Brien! I repeat, I am not O'Brien! Ask anyone! Jerry! JERRY!
George: I just got here. My car broke down on the Belt Parkway.
Jerry: Oh, I can't believe-- why don't you get rid of that piece of junk?
George: One mile from the exit, it starts shaking, really violently shaking, like it's having a nervous breakdown, then it completely stopped dead.
Jerry: So, you have no car?
Jerry: So, what good are you?
Notes and Trivia
The character "Eva" is named for Eva Braun, who was Adolf Hitler's girlfriend, and - ultimately - his wife, during World War II.
The Chicago Bulls actually played the New York Knicks at Madison Square Garden two weeks prior to the episode being broadcast.
Kramer's stand-in, who frequently appears as an extra on the show, actually has a line when he asks George, "Hey do you have the time?"
Actress Suzanne Snyder (Eva) comes back to the series as Audrey in "The Pie."
Jerry's apartment and the coffee shop are not featured in this episode.
Jerry quips "Nice looking Luger" after Eva selects a pistol from the case. The gun is actually a Walther P38.
In the airport scene Jerry's scarf is awkwardly draped over his shoulder, but in some cuts it is not. Also, his collar is tucked underneath his coat, but later it is magically straightened.
|Jerry Seinfeld||Jerry Seinfeld|
|Julia Louis-Dreyfus||Elaine Benes|
|Jason Alexander||George Costanza|
|Adam Leslie||Man at Protest|
|Norman Brenner||Man at Airport|
|Aaron Kanarek||Protestor #1|
|Ray Glanzmann||Protester #2|