S05E14 - The Marine Biologist
No: 78 | Season: 5 Episode: 14 | Air Date: 10-Feb-1994 | Production #513
Jerry meets an old college classmate who asked about George, whom Jerry says is now a "marine biologist." An infuriated Russian writer tosses an electronic organizer belonging to Elaine out of a limousine that hits a passerby on the head. Kramer struggles with his golf swing and sand. While walking along the beach, George is called on to use his marine biology skills to save a whale.
Director and Writers
Director: Tom Cherones
Writers: Ron Hauge
Jerry: (trying to make George look good) He's working on lowering the cholesterol level in whales. All that blubber, it's quite unhealthy. You know, it's the largest mammal on earth. But as George says, they don't have to be.
George: The sea was angry that day, my friends - like an old man trying to send back soup in a deli. I got about fifty feet out and suddenly the great beast appeared before me. I tell you he was ten stories high if he was a foot. As if sensing my presence, he let out a great bellow. I said, "Easy, big fella!" And then, as I watched him struggling, I realized that something was obstructing its breathing. From where I was standing, I could see directly into the eye of the great fish.
Kramer: Well, what did you do next?
George: Well then, from out of nowhere, a huge tidal wave lifted me, tossed me like a cork, and I found myself right on top of him - face to face with the blowhole. I could barely see from the waves crashing down upon me but I knew something was there. So I reached my hand in, felt around, and pulled out the obstruction.
(George reveals the obstruction to be a golf ball)
Kramer: What is that, a Titleist?
Kramer: Hole in one, huh?
Jerry: Your mother reads your mail?
Jerry: What do you mean, like postcards?
George: Oh, anything.
Jerry: She doesn't open.
George: She'll open.
Jerry: You've caught your mother opening envelopes?
Jerry: What does she say?
George: I was curious.
Jerry: Isn't that against the law?
George: Maybe I can get her locked up.
George: As I made my way past the breakers, a sudden calm came over me. I don't know if it was divine intervention, or the kinship of all living things. But I tell you Jerry, at that moment, I was a marine biologist.
Kramer: Hey... Who wants to have some fun?
Jerry/George: I do!
Kramer: Now are you just saying you want to have fun, or do you really want to have fun?
Jerry: I really want to have fun!
George: I'm just saying I want to have some fun.
Kramer: I've got five hundred Titleists that I got from the driving range in the trunk of my car. Why don't we drive out to Rockaway, and hit 'em.... into the ocean! Picture this: we find a nice sweet spot between the dunes, take out our drivers, we tee up, and poof! The ball goes sailing up into the sky, holds there for a moment, and then: uggh!
Notes and Trivia
George's final monologue was not in the original script. Larry David came up with the idea while the episode was being filmed and wrote it on the spot. Jason Alexander quickly memorized the monologue and only one take was filmed.
In the scene where Elaine complains to Kramer about her pocket organizer, you can see a photo of Jerry on Kramer's wall.
It is Larry David's voice you hear on the beach uttering the line, "Is anyone here a marine biologist?"
When Jerry asks Elaine what room Testikoff is in she says 308. However, when the author opens the door it reads 507.
George starts walking towards the water, and once he starts wading in, his pant legs have miraculously been rolled up.
George is telling the story of his encounter with the whale... the whale let out a great bellow and George calms the whale "easy big fella". As he says this, Elaine has her arm resting on the table. A split second later, her arm is upright.
|Julia Louis-Dreyfus||Elaine Benes|
|Jerry Seinfeld||Jerry Seinfeld|
|Julia Louis-Dreyfus||Elaine Benes|
|Jason Alexander||George Costanza|
|David Blackwood||Hotel Clerk|
|Heather Morgan||Woman on Beach|
|Ruth Cohen||Ruthie Cohen|
|Larry David||Man on Beach (voice) (uncredited)|